I'm Living It

Naturally, this being a small island and knowing so many people, I run into friendly faces every day asking how life is. Often in these conversations, knowing that Sky and I were recently wed, friends ask how married life is going. When I tell them not well and that I'm leaving island, they are usually shocked! They want to know why, what's going on, what happened for things to change so suddenly when we seemed so happy? And I'm honest... I tell them I'm leaving my marriage because it's abusive. I know that marriage is a serious undertaking, and I went into it happily and willingly. I never imagined, though, that three weeks in I would be physically abused and put into the situation of choosing between the man I love and my own safety. That was definitely not a part of the happily ever after I had in mind! Once friends know the circumstances of my leaving, most have been very supportive of me, telling me I'm doing the right thing by going. I'm endlessly thankful for all the encouragement and love most people have shown me. Life has been so hard lately and it's the kind words and support being given to me that help me through these sometimes hellish days.

Now on the other hand, I have definitely gotten some responses more along the line of Oh it'll work itself out, Keep trying, Hang in there, Marriage is hard at first but it gets better... And while I agree under normal circumstances, violence against your intimate, married partner seems a deal-breaker no matter the excuse. I think at the end of the day everyone deserves to feel safe, loved, and cherished especially in a marriage where you have promised those virtues to one another. Violently putting your hands on someone is a surefire way to rip those things away and replace them with fear, anxiety, and hurt. Sadly I know, I'm living it.

I look forward to the move, if only to be able to start healing and moving on with my life. I know there are so many exciting, new things to look forward to in Colorado, but the heartbreak and the gravity of this situation is clouding my sunny outlook on things. Only 4 days until I leave island and make a fresh start for myself, and I am alternately excited and terrified, with terror winning out a majority of the time. Universe give me courage and strength please, I need it!

Chakra Balancing Videos

Help balance your chakras with one or more of these videos! I do one every day; here are my favorites!